Archive for August, 2010

Tuesdays With Dorie – Espresso-Chocolate Shortbread Cookies

Posted in food on August 31, 2010 by uglydudefood

These are amazing. Somehow I managed to get the perfect crumbly texture in these. As always, the looks are where I slacked a bit. Deal with it. Cue sunglasses.

It's pronounced expresso.

I’ll shovel these to the people at work. They’re coffee junkies – and hell, they ate carrot cookies, so I’m fairly certain they’ll tolerate these.

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Toll House Cupcakes

Posted in food on August 29, 2010 by uglydudefood

These cupcakes are family favorites – these are the treats we always supplied for the class on our birthdays in elementary school. The reason for this is because they are awesome.

YOU HAVE TO PAY THE TROLL TOLL

They are more cookie than cupcake – it’s a cookie-dough batter with a filling of egg, brown sugar, and chocolate chips. They’re gooey and amaaaazing.

This is the recipe. We’ve never used the nuts, but you know. Experiment.

Crazy. Pizza. Bread.

Posted in food on August 27, 2010 by uglydudefood

I made a version of this recipe for CRAZY PIZZA BREAD. Crazy.

Not crazy, not pizza, not bread

It was very good, although really with all of the cheese tucked in like a pocket, it was pretty much a stromboli. I didn’t use olives because Rachel doesn’t like them. I carmelized some onions and chopped up some salami to use as the “toppings” that were mixed into the dough. This tasted really, really good; I didn’t use a tomato dipping sauce and I didn’t feel like one was necessary.

EDITED, 7:00AM

Kat asked me to show a picture of the inside. Since she is a member of the pay-area of the site, I am required to deliver on something raunchy every once in a while.

The only disappointing thing about this bread is the way it looks inside; it probably could have stood with some peppers for the sake of color. But really, it’s a cheesy savory bread that’s meant to be cut into breadsticks and the carmelized onions and salami work with each other perfectly, sweet and salty. So TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT, KAT. I’LL SEE YOU IN HELL.

Tuesdays With Dorie – Crunchy and Custardy Peach Tart

Posted in food on August 24, 2010 by uglydudefood

I understand that my mini-tarts look like cheeseburger quiche. This does not make them any less delicious.

LET THE CHEESE FLAVOR WASH OVER YOUR TASTE BUDS.

Lumps of cookie-ish streusel on top of a custard peach tart. I’m super pleased by this recipe, and the hassle of dragging out my food processor for the dough was offset by the ease of making the custard (whisk together, pour, and bake). I even did a fair-to-good job of cutting the peach in a presentable way, not that you can tell under the cookie lumps.

Anyway, kid-tested and mother approved. I am the kid; the dog is the mother.

Cookies and Cream Cupcakes with Fudge Frosting

Posted in food on August 21, 2010 by uglydudefood

Oh fudge

Rachel bought three cupcake books to aid us in our pre-wedding-cake experiments. Two of the books have recipes that start with “choose favorite cake mix.” These are not books that I plan on using for these experiments.

The third, infinitely better book is called “Crazy About Cupcakes” by Krystina Castella. All of the recipes are from scratch; there are over fifty cake recipes and over thirty icing/frosting recipes. The rest of the book details specific combinations, each with additional ingredients and decorating techniques to match whatever theme you’d be going for.

For hush-hush reasons, I had cause to make some cupcakes for today. With a few notable exceptions (red velvet and pink velvet), I’ve been stuck in the vanilla/chocolate cupcake vortex. It sucks you in. It’s easy, it’s familiar, and it’s boring as shit. Still, those are the likely route I’ll be going with our wedding cupcakes, so it doesn’t hurt to perfect the old standards.

We went through the recipes in this book and came up with this combination. The cookies and cream cupcake recipe is loaded with delicious whole milk and vanilla, and then packed with crushed Oreos (or Hydrox or Generic Brand Sandwich Cookies). The batter is pure white and looks exactly like a Hershey’s Cookies N Cream bar.

I ATE THIS

The cupcakes obviously colored a little darker in the oven, but they are still delicious. There’s something just slightly chewy about the consistency that isn’t particularly bad but just different.

We went with the fudge frosting recipe from this book because it was a suggested pairing in the appendix. The frosting is a ganache-type bit of business made of cream, corn syrup, sugar, chocolate, vanilla, and butter. Rachel was disappointed by this. It’s not piped on like a buttercream would be (I reckon she was expecting a chocolate buttercream frosting). She says that she couldn’t even taste it. I could actually taste the frosting and thought it worked very well, although it was a little sparse for my taste. The cupcake recipe makes 24 and even a double batch of this frosting leaves just a light coating. The rest of our taste-testers will have to be the tiebreaking vote on this one.

Tuesdays With Dorie – Oatmeal Breakfast Bread

Posted in food on August 17, 2010 by uglydudefood

Here we are. Another Tuesday and another brief-but-dumb post from the ugliest foodiest dude you know.

I used raisins in this bread, although I wish I had used dried cherries or chopped up dried apricots because I’ve never really used them in baked goods and raisins are overdone. The bread is super-soft, probably due to the applesauce/oil base. Tastes great.

This post is brought to you by Wheat Thins, spray-oil, and a dirty rag!

I’m not sure if I was supposed to, but I got a nice bready crust on this. I’ve discovered that if Dorie tells me to bake something for 55-65 minutes, I should take it out at 50.

I’ve started taking blog pictures with my iPhone, which does not even provide the quality that my years-old point-and-shoot digital gives; however, it makes the process much easier.

Ghetto Soft Pretzels

Posted in food on August 12, 2010 by uglydudefood

I made soft pretzels tonight using this recipe. They taste really good, and like you’d expect from this website, they look dumb as hell.

I call them Whitey Whackers

Previous recipes have never really browned properly for me; this recipe involves parboiling the uncooked dough in a baking soda solution prior to baking. IT WORKED. IT’S A MIRACLE.

On the next attempt, I’ll probably use the same recipe and work on making the pretzels thinner and more edible-looking. I also may attempt to use the recipe to make pretzel rolls for sandwiches. Rachel also has requested a pretzel-based pizza crust in the past, which sounds disgusting but may be worth a shot.

MEANWHILE

Apparently my friend Ashley is starting a food blog, and you should check it out. Food-Like.com. CLICK IT.

She had asked on Facebook: “What interests you about food.” I posted an answer, and I spent a whole five minutes typing it. Since that’s more time than I’ve spent on any single blog post in two years, I figure I’ll post it here. This is what I like about food.

I like that food can be an expression of art. I like that food can be an expression of science, and that you can break food down into the smallest micronutrients, each with their own function. I like the insane techniques of molecular gastronomy, where the chef breaks the food down to its essentials in an entirely different way.I like that you can make like a mad scientist, take a bunch of different powders, and end up with some complete dish that tastes great and bears no resemblance to the original ingredients. I like that the enjoyment of food is really the only desire in the world that isn’t stigmatized, and that food is the only thing in the world in which society accepts trashiness. I like the fact that food can be intensely personal, and that you can exert time and energy into preparing and sharing good food with people you care about. I also like the way food tastes.

So that’s what I think your blog (and any good food blog) should be about. Don’t make it clinical; celebrate food, dude.

Almost brings a tear to your eye, doesn’t it?